David Attenborough has a fantastic series on BBC One at the moment, called Animal Crime Scene. In it, the site of an animal’s dead body is forensically investigated for the most likely assassin. Last week’s programme focused on a green turtle, this week’s, a carabou. The twist in the carabou tale was that it had been dead 10,000 years.

It is a very novel approach for a wildlife programme, well worth a look. Tune in next week…….

Wednesdays, 2030hrs, BBC One

The Luas has been very very crowded all summer. So much so that I have been dreading the return of the school people. But today, I had my first sighting of them. It was on an evening luas. Three girls, in their long kilts and green jumpers and green socks. One in the de rigeur boating shoes, one in a black pair of ballet style pumps and another in a black and gold set of runners.

They were a great source of amusement. Conversing as they were, as Gaeilge and as Bearla. They switched intermittently between the two. Stories of pubs and underage drinking and fake IDs in English, other matters like boys and people in Irish. They were standing just in front of where I was sitting, but I pretended not to be listening to them, even though I was, just to see how much out of touch I am, or how things have changed. Things, it seems, haven’t changed. They seemed to be talking about the sort of things I used to talk about as a teenager.

As I approached my stop I stood up and moved to the door. Instant conversion to Irish. Lest I understand. I had to stuggle to stifle my laughter. Foreign I ain’t. Foreign looking I ain’t. I coudn’t figure it out. Is Irish the new cool, or are they just getting back into the flow for whatever gaeilscoil they may attend. It made me think though, that in this day and age, when there are lots more foreigners in Ireland than there used to be, maybe it is time we all started to converse as Gaeilge. It’s a good way to assert our Irishness. And like others, who haven’t really used Irish in the years since we left school, Níl mo Ghaeilge go leir caillte agam.

Hmm. What Caoimhe wants, Caoimhe gets!
Seven things I plan to do before I die:

i) Live in France
ii) Find a career that makes me feel fulfilled
iii) Learn to play the piano
iv) Buy a sailboat and sail across the Atlantic, or if possible, around the world
v) Run a marathon
vi) Take art classes, even though I am utterly crap
vii) Train myself to be an optimist rather than a pessimist

Seven things I can do:

i) Read
ii) Write
iii) Recite my ten times tables
iv) Bake
v) Cook
vi) Whistle
vii) Program in several computer languages

Seven things I can not do:

i) See things in shades of grey
ii) Suffer fools
iii) Stop being a nit-picker
iv) Read music
v) Fold my tongue (that’s genetic, I believe)
vi) A handstand
vii) Peel an apple in one piece

Seven things I find really attractive about the opposite sex:

i) Physical strength
ii) Energy
iii) Rippled muscles
iv) Ability to make be laugh
v) Ability to make me feel like someone is on my side, even when I’m being totally irrational and clearly in the wrong
vi) Ability to listen
vii) Height

Seven things I say the most:

i) “I’m tired”
ii) “Gobshite!” (muttered when driving)
iii) “Hello” (as in a greeting, not as in how Chandler says it)
iv) “I don’t want to get up”
v) “OK”
vi) “It’s your turn to…….”
vii) “Emmm”

Seven books I love

i) To kill a Mocking Bird
ii) Schott’s food and drink miscellany
iii) The Good Doctor
iv) Anil’s Ghost
v) King Solomon’s Mines
vi) Pride and Prejuidice
vii) The Rainbow

Seven people I would like to see take this quiz…………..